Fake
by AutumnsFey
Summary: Being in the Mafia is nothing to be envied, nor was it ever something Tsuna had wanted to experience. But his blood was demanding - demands even those close to him would choose to see fullfilled before they would stand by his side. Knowing that, it shouldn't come as a surprise that even the one pure and good thing in his life turned out to be nothing but a lie - still, it hurt.


**It hurt.**

It hurt so damn much.

And the worst thing about this damn pain?

He had invited it with a smile.

**Why did he always have to make a fool out of himself?**

**It had been raining the whole day.**

The angry heavy clouds hadn't let up, darkening the sky as an unforgiving wind howled through the empty rain-pelted streets. The storm was unrelenting.

He didn't know how long he had already been sitting there.

His eyes stared at the river without actually seeing it. His feet were aching, his legs burning; his whole body was hunched in on itself, arms desperately wound around his knees in a lost bid to keep a hold of at least something tangible.

Something real.

He knew that it had been too good to be true. That the second shoe was just waiting to drop. But … but he hadn't expected for it to drop in the way it finally did … not, he hadn't expected it like that.

He should have.

**There was no forgetting the way his heart had raced as he stood before Kyoko-chan**, his hands trembling. He hadn't been able to look her in the eyes, but he still had stood his ground. For once, he wanted to do it right. He wanted her to know how much she meant to him. This would be his last try. He was prepared to stop after this, to get over his crush on her. Or try to, at least.

And so, he gathered all his courage and asked her out. One last time.

(Prepared for another rejection.)

She said yes.

He hadn't believed his ears at first, sure that he had misheard. But she had actually agreed to go on a date with him, with a smile on her face. He couldn't think clearly, only stammering a nonsensical response as she kissed him on the cheek and walked away.

It was the start of something beautiful.

Their first date, a picnic in the park with a variety of little cake pieces from Kyoko-chan's favorite bakery was a success, and they had so much fun. They talked well into the evening, and he escorted her home.

She gave him his first kiss.

First date. First kiss. Officially boyfriend and girlfriend.

For the first time in his life, he had something truly good going on. Something untouched by his personal failings, something real that hadn't been dictated by other's or tainted by the whole 'Heir of a Crime Syndicate'-burden. They were just a boy and a girl …

In love. They had actually said it on their fifth date. They were a boy and a girl in love with each other.

His heart felt warm.

This was true happiness.

**(Tsunayoshi had always been good at lying to himself.**

This was no different.

He simply chose to ignore his intuition.

Denial was his lifeline.

_There was nothing wrong here!_)

**It had been too good.**

He had been happy. Just this once, he had been genuinely happy.

But happiness for him?

Didn't last.

Maybe he should never have tried ...

**The one thing worse than seeing your father, who should have been in Italy, secretly meeting with your girlfriend in Japan?**

Being forced to listen as said girlfriend complained about being fed up with your father because the man hadn't come through on their deal to help her become a ballerina nearly as quickly as she had wanted him to – a help he had assured her of in exchange for her acting as if she cared for you.

Sounds like a bad teenage drama novel? Yeah, Tsuna never entertained that this could be his life, either.

But … as good as he had become at lying to himself, not even he could deny the conversation he had overheard.

_' You promised me that I would get the best training!'_

_' And you will. It is just a bit difficult to get the maestro out of his actual contract. Calm down, Kyoko-san.'_

_' I don't want to calm down – and you should really hurry along, Iemitsu-san. It would be just too bad if Tsuna somehow found out that you have hired me to go out with him. His own father, just imagine little Tsuna's reaction.'_

_' Ha. You are really nothing more than a pretty package of poison, are you, girl? It would be in your best interest to keep your trap shut. You know what I am capable of. And you don't want me angry.'_

_' Same here, Iemitsu-san. If you want to keep your little boy's heart intact, deliver. I am getting impatient.'_

_' Just keep going out with Tsunayoshi-kun. He needs to be kept malleable, and you are the best means to that end. As long as it means keeping you safe, which will only matter for as long as you manage to keep him wrapped around your little finger, Tsunayoshi-kun will do whatever we ask of him. Keep to our deal, and you will get the money and tutors you want.'_

_' Don't let me wait too long. Freudian slips happen.'_

_He had been frozen._

_His brain was completely empty, save for those words repeating in his mind, over and over again …_

_' … you hired me to go out with him …'_

He stared at his lap, at his balled fists, unmoving even as blood started to slowly drip down between his fingers, escaping from the cuts his nails had left in his deceptively soft flesh.

But those cuts were nothing compared to the slashes tearing apart his heart.

There was no place for denial, there was no misinterpreting those words.

Sasagawa Kyoko had never been in love with him.

She didn't give a fuck about him.

For her? He was a means to an end.

One she would prefer to do without.

Tsuna closed his eyes.

He wouldn't cry. Not now. Not where others could see.

That one satisfaction no one would get.

**He had been waiting for the other shoe to drop.**

He just hadn't expected it to trample all over the pretty illusion he had allowed Kyoko-chan to spin around them. It was a bitter taste, letting reality repaint his memories of their time together.

That kick in the balls he could have done without.

_**(Fake.**_

_Fake._

_Fake._

_Everything had been faked._

_Lie._

_Lie._

_Lie._

_A well-constructed lie._

_Fuck fake love.)_

_**(' … kept malleable …'**_

_Malleable?_

_Why had he even bothered to give that man a second chance?_

_Why had he allowed the naive child within him to be that stupid?_

_Fool me once, shame on you._

_Fool me twice, shame on me._

_I'm done being a fool.)_

**There were a lot of things that could be said about Sawada Tsunayoshi.**

He had been an absolute no-good-student as a child.

He was clumsy, a little whimpish and tended to shriek when surprised.

He never could stand up for himself, but when it concerned his friends, you should never cross him.

He learned from his mistakes. It may take a while, it may not be as quick as it would be with others, but once you burned him, he tended not to get burned again. One way or another, he steeled himself and showed a resolve that even his opponents couldn't help but openly admire.

And once he found out that the girl he had been in love with since Middle School played him like a fiddle?

He straightened, let the steel settle in his spin, and made his choice.

Sasagawa Kyoko and Sawada Tsunayoshi? Were done with each other. For good.

He didn't hesitate in letting her know of it. And he showed her the same regard she had shown him.

He hit the send button on his smartphone.

_**Message from Tsuna-Kun~:**_

_We are done._

**He chose not to go to school that day.**

There was no reason to subjugate himself to even more manipulation. And knowing Kyoko? She would purse her pretty lips, let those pearly tears drop and spit out lie after lie – all to get whatever she wanted. Maybe she would get Onii-chan to confront Tsuna, maybe she could even provoke her brother into beating Tsuna up. Not his idea of a successful school day.

Instead, he wandered around the city, letting his feet carry him wherever they wanted to go.

He only wanted to be alone.

**Fake.**

Everything had been faked.

Every kiss.

Every touch.

Every promise.

He had given her his heart.

She had played it expertly.

He had to give that to her.

She was terrifying at faking love.

**Lies.**

Lies.

Lies.

Nothing but lies.

And he had been caught in her web.

Fool.

He had been such a fool.

**Play with fire and get burned.**

Trust a Mist Element User and get deceived.

He should have learned his lesson well before.

**His face was wet.**

He could taste the salty tang of his tears mixed within the rain drops still falling down.

How pathetic.

And for what? What – who did he cry for?

The girl who had broken his naive heart?

The father who had destroyed what little relationship they had managed to re-built back up?

He didn't know … and he was just too damn tired of their shit too care any longer. Everything that had happened in the last three years had been pre-scripted for him.

His guardians, his friends – chosen by his tutor and his father

His fate, his future – chosen by the Ninth, by the blood in his veins.

His girlfriend, his ambitions – chosen, apparently, by his father, by the expectations of strangers he held no care for.

What was there for him to fight for?

Did his family know of this? Did his friends? Had everyone lied to him?

He didn't know … and he didn't want to ask …

A small part of him dreaded the answer, was so damn afraid to have his fears confirmed, to lose the last anchors he had, but this same small part knew that he should ask, that he needed the clarity, needed to know once and for all where he stood with his precious people …

But the bigger part? The part that didn't even need to scream? The part whose silence was so much louder than the nagging of his doubts and fears?

That part was too tired to bend down and pick up the pieces. For once, he was too tired to try.

Just this once – he would let it go.

Because letting it go? Didn't mean forgiveness. Didn't mean forgetting.

It meant stopping to care.

Because caring hurt.

And he was done hurting for fake love.

_**~ The End ~**_


End file.
